


Terrible Waffles

by neuronary



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Allison Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Allison Hargreeves-centric, Asexual Allison Hargreeves, F/M, Good Husband Raymond Chestnut, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Sex, Internalised aphobia, Mute Allison Hargreeves, Period-Typical Racism, Relationship Discussions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:49:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26583166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neuronary/pseuds/neuronary
Summary: On their wedding night, Ray wraps his arms around her, presses his lips to her forehead, and turns off the lights with a yawn. Allison’s stomach twists, first in confusion, then further anxiety. She doesn’t know what’s going on and she doesn’t know who to ask and it scares her.They don’t talk about it. Until they do.---Allison Hargreeves is asexual. She doesn't know there's a word for it, but that doesn't matter so much with Ray.
Relationships: Raymond Chestnut/Allison Hargreeves
Comments: 12
Kudos: 137





	Terrible Waffles

**Author's Note:**

> Prompted by this ask:
> 
> _headcanon: allison doesn’t know she’s ace (or she doesn’t have the words) but she never felt totally comfy with Patrick’s advances. With Ray, she managed to set that boundary and he was totally accepting. Instead of s3x, they just cuddled LOADS and Allison got the love that she deserves. Anyways yes to ace Allison_

There are a lot of things Allison hates about the sixties. It would take far too long to list them all, but of the lesser things: she misses the internet, the ready availability of cameras, and the relative safety with which she walked home at night.

(She can run perfectly fine in heels, but she doesn’t like to risk it anymore, not without her voice to back her up if she really, really needs it.)

Some things, though, she doesn’t mind so much. Most notably: the dating norms. She’s been to dinner with Raymond Chestnut four times and the most he’s done is brush his fingers against hers across the table. It’s put her in the admittedly unfamiliar position of finding herself wanting... something.

Back in the twenty-first century, Allison had simply learned to go along with what men wanted. She wasn’t always happy about it, but she wasn’t upset enough to recognise it as unhappiness, so she’d settled. Patrick had always been one to push, encourage, demand, even when she’d made her disinterest clear. Even after a temporary rumour. She’d learned to go along with it. Relationships were about compromise.

She’d never wanted any of the men around her because they’d been far too busy wanting her. She’d never had the opportunity to want them back. She’d thought that was how it worked.

Then Ray had come along and flipped the entire thing on its head and Allison was left feeling like the little broken part of her might be bigger than she’d first thought.

_ “He is so my type,” one of the regulars, Cherry, lamented over a perm one afternoon. “You don’t know how lucky you are.” _

_ Allison gave her a stiff smile in acknowledgement and went back to her sweeping. Odessa noticed (because she noticed everything) and whacked Cherry’s shoulder with a rolled up magazine whenever she crossed over the line into comments that could be classed as ‘vulgar’. _

On their fifth date, Allison Hargreeves and Raymond Chestnut hold hands as they walk home. Allison thinks it might be the most physical contact she’s had with another human being in months. She wants enough that, when they finally get to the door of the house she shares with three other girls and Odessa ( _ ”it’s not a damn boarding house; you don’t need to pay me and you can stay as long as you need, sweetheart” _ ), she draws up more courage than she ever needed before shooting a man in the stomach and presses a kiss to Raymond’s cheek.

The surprised-but-pleased look on his face as she vanishes through her front door is well worth the teasing of her housemates.

_ Allison really should have seen it coming. Cherry got her friend to distract Odessa so that the rest of The Regulars could corner her. _

_ “So,” Cherry said, smirking with the kind of confidence Allison had spent her whole life faking. “How is he, y’know, in the sack?” _

_ She couldn’t exactly pretend she didn’t know what they were talking about; she did. It didn’t mean she wanted to tell them that Raymond had still only kissed her once, or that she didn’t understand why he hadn’t pushed for more yet. _

_ She didn’t need to. Cherry’s eyes widened slightly and her jaw dropped. Allison took the moment of silence to notice that she’d grabbed a notebook and pen, in acknowledgement of Allison’s forced silence. She didn’t know whether or not that merited appreciation. _

_ “You still haven’t, have you?” _

_ “Oh would you girls have some damn respect and leave poor Allison alone?” Odessa snapped from the front of the room. “Lord knows the girl deserves a bit of peace and quiet, and y’all just badger her, day in, day out!” _

_ Cherry had the decency to look cowed. “Sorry, Allison,” she mumbled, slinking back to her chair. _

_ “Besides,” Odessa continued, “that Ray’s a good, god-fearing young man. You could at least wait for him to pop the question before you start begging for scraps of gossip.” _

_ Allison was so startled she actually made a noise, somewhere between a ‘what’ and a squeak. Odessa laughed, her loud, unapologetic kind, and patted her hand. _

When Ray does propose, Allison realises what it means in less than a second, makes a terrible, painful excuse, and runs all the way home. Odessa calls her a fool and doesn’t speak to her for three days. She doesn’t see Ray for an entire week, at which point she’s seriously considering packing up the four outfits she owns and trying again in a different city.

He comes to the house, which is a first, with flowers, which is not, and apologises. Odessa tells her not to waste her second chance, makes them sit in the parlour, and shoos everyone else to the kitchen while they talk. Allison knows for a fact that the kitchen is empty and the door has four ears pressed against it, but Ray’s the one doing all the talking so she can’t bring herself to mind.

He tells her about how he picked the ring, about how he knew he loved her, about asking for Odessa’s blessing, about “you hurt her and I’ll make sure you get hurt too”, then says, oh so softly:

“I’m not nearly as scared of Odessa as I am of hurting you.”

Allison cries because he’s the first person since Claire to say he loves her and mean it, then nods because she’s not so afraid anymore. She never should have been, really, she knows what to expect.

Until she doesn’t.

On their wedding night, Ray wraps his arms around her, presses his lips to her forehead, and turns off the lights with a yawn. Allison’s stomach twists, first in confusion, then further anxiety. She doesn’t know what’s going on and she doesn’t know who to ask and it scares her.

They don’t talk about it. Until they do. 

Allison sits on the bed with her knees drawn to her chest like a child and Ray says, “that’s not the sort of thing you can force on someone,” and she very nearly cries and wonders if Ray thinks there’s something wrong with her too. She offers to get drunk and he looks horrified so she tries to take it back. He wraps his hands around hers and says, “When you’re ready, if you want to,” and “Never is fine,” and “I love you,” and Allison falls asleep with her head tucked into the crook of his neck feeling the safest she’s ever felt in her life.

The next day, she tells him as much as she can about Claire without sounding like she’s gone completely insane. He reads what she’s written in a three page letter and asks, simply, “Do you ever want to have kids again?” and adds, “you can think about it for as long as you want,” when she looks nervous.

She doesn’t, not now, but she loves him for asking. She tells him as much a week later and they make terrible waffles together and laugh about their own inability to cook. For the first time since she last saw her daughter, Allison thinks she might be truly, entirely happy.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! you can come find me on tumblr [@neuronary](https://neuronary.tumblr.com) if you wanna yell more about ace allison, or just tua in general.


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